Pre-flight checklist (Part One and Two):
- Snooze the alarm. Debate if you really want to get up and workout.
- Pull one foot out of the bed and place it on the floor. One small step for man, one giant leap for you personally…
- Snooze the alarm again. Now, get backside out of the bed.
- Get dressed into your workout clothes. Trip while attempting to put second leg through shorts and bang knee into wall. Whisper “Sorry Honey” in the dark while hopping around on one foot as quietly as possible. Refrain from cursing.
- Enter the bathroom and jettison any excess weight. Quietly!
- Step on the scale and record vital statistics. Refrain from cursing.
- Critical: Brush your teeth (yes, very important) and put on deodorant (not so critical)
- Ensure adequate hydration by drinking lots of water (but not so much that you have to repeat Step Five).
- Perform a self-review in reflective surface. A.k.a check your hair in the mirror. Tamper down with hat or water (Optional: pray you do not run into anyone you know). Wipe toothpaste from lip. Whisper: “You still got it while pointing at your reflection and winking.
- Put on sneakers (A.K.A. trainers) and lace them up comfortably.
- Head for the front door.
Congratulations! You have successfully completed Part One of the pre-flight check list.
NOTE: If you make the mistake of making coffee and sitting on the couch fast forward to having an average run-of-the-mill kind of day.
- Step out of the front door.
Congratulations! You have successfully completed Part Two of the pre-flight checklist. You are now clear for take off.
If you make it out the front door you will have achieved what 80% of the rest of the world could not do today and that is exercise. The rest of our lazy butts are still in bed. You are cleared to have a kick ass day while the rest of us fight off sleepiness, stagnation and worst of all: mediocrity. Go forth and kick butt!