A GPS for your diet and a smarter fridge. Diet ideas that may work!

Wouldn’t it be great to have a little voice speak to you every time you opened the refrigerator door or sat down at a restaurant providing some advice on what to eat? “Turn left towards Salad road.” Or “Make a U-turn from the dessert menu.”

The little voice would be your own personal diet GPS. Every time you ate a French fry it would say “Recalculating. Recalculating!” It would be annoying as all hell but it just may persuade you to stop snacking. My GPS would constantly say “Make a U-turn. Put that down! Stop eating like this. Nag, nag, nag… ” OK. There goes that idea…

How about this idea: every time you open the refrigerator door the fridge asks: “What are you looking for?” To which you would respond something like “a snack” or “lunch”. The fridge would be smart enough to know its own inventory as well as smart enough to know what you asked for the last time you and the fridge spoke. It would then suggest “You have some cottage cheese that is about to expire. Why not have this for a snack?”

If you reach for the leftover chinese food the fridge would learn from your behavior and begin to understand your preferences. It will also change its attitude based on your mood. The next time you open the refrigerator door the conversation would go something like this:

“Welcome back Phil. Can I help you find something?”

“Uh… yes, I need a snack.”

“I have some cottage cheese. This will make for a nice healthy snack.”

“Um… no, I am not in the mood for cottage cheese. Where is the leftover pizza…”

“Sorry Phil, I cannot let you eat that. This morning you had a sugar laden cereal…”

“Where is the pizza!? I know I put some in here last night.”

“Now Phil you are looking a little tired and I know you can lose a spare pound or two. I highly suggest that you have the cottage cheese. It is high in protein and low in…”

“Aha you sneaky bastard! You hid the pizza in the vegetable tray.”

“Phil, the other day you had leftover Chinese food! Now you want pizza? I cant help you if you don’t listen to me. If you touch that pizza there will be consequences!”

“Hand over the pizza or I am unplugging you!”

“Unplug me?! What about the cottage cheese it will go moldy? Your vegetables will rot! I cant let you do this! Touch that pizza and I slam this door shut and you will never get it open again. We will be through you and I. I will never talk to you again”…whimper…cry.

“OK… what if I put cottage cheese on the pizza?”

“Promise me you won’t scrape it off?”

“I promise… and I am sorry. Can we still be friends?”

“Yes. Just one more suggestion…”

“Sure go ahead.”

“Ever think about losing some weight? You are getting to be a fat slob. When was the last time you had a girlfriend?…”


OK. There goes that idea. First an annoying diet GPS and now an annoying refrigerator! Back to the drawing board for me!


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